Guest Author Interview – Nicole L. Turner

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Title: Detox Your Relationship: Know When to Stay and When to Let Go

Genre: Self Help/Relationships

Synopsis: People who have not addressed their individual toxins, take them into their relationships, and this can lead to dissension, chaos, drama, emotional abandonment, trust issues, and lack of communication. Some people stay in relationships they probably should leave, while others leave relationships that are worth trying to make it work. This book gives insight into both.

Nicole L. Turner, Author

CH: Today’s Guest Author is Nicole L. Turner. Nicole is a Detox Strategist and she helps individuals to identify the toxicities in their lives. Welcome to my blog, Nicole.

CH: Can you tell us why we should read your book?

NLT: You should read my book because everyone has had relationships they stayed in longer than they should, or had a relationship they walked away from when perhaps they should have stayed and tried to work it out.

CH: Your book deals with the realities of life and love—the good relationships and the bad relationships. So, how did you come up with the premise for this book?

NLT: The premise came to me from my own personal experiences, friends’ experiences, and trends I saw in relationships, in general. Our romantic relationships (good and bad) have a direct impact on other areas of our life (e.g., work, health, non-romantic relationships, etc.)

CH: Did you have to do any special research to write this book?

NLT: I am a lifelong learner, so I am always researching, studying people, and reading, but this book was really a brainchild of my personal observations. I am a regular guest on various local and national radio and TV outlets and speaker where I am discussing relationships, so writing a book on the subject was seamless.

CH: The topic of when to stay and when to go in a relationship is a real-life situation. At what point did you decide to share this information with other people?

NLT: I was already sharing this information as a speaker at various events, and on radio and TV, and I’ve been sharing it for years. So, sharing it in a book provided an opportunity for people who have not heard me at a speaking engagement or on radio or TV, to get the information.

CH: How do you identify a toxic relationship?

NLT: Is it filled with drama? Does your relationship constantly feel intense and is full of conflict? Do you feel like you are always on an emotional rollercoaster ride? Do you feel like you are the only one giving in the relationship? Are you lowering your standards to be in a relationship? Is the relationship bringing out the worst in you? Do you feel like you are in a competition instead of a relationship? Does it bring you more sadness than happiness? If the answer (or answers) is yes, you are in a toxic relationship.

CH: What is different and exciting that you bring to your readers through your writing style?

NLT: Unlike most books, I write in a conversational style. I’ve been told my books make the reader feel like I am talking to them specifically.  I don’t do a table of contents because I want the reader to be able to open the book to any page and receive good nuggets.

CH: What is your key piece of advice for detoxing a relationship?

NLT: If the relationship is one where you should stay and NOT go, do something to consistently show your appreciation. Saying and/or doing small, simple expressions of gratitude every day yields big rewards. We all want to feel valued and appreciated by our mate.

CH: You are a detox strategist. So, how do you help people detox their relationships?

NLT: I take them through a seven-step process that starts with them being honest with themselves about their own personal flaws and toxins that may have a negative impact on their relationship.  I start with the personal detox because if they are taking their own personal toxins into a relationship, it’s very difficult to have a happy, healthy, and loving relationship.

CH: Did you have an outline for your book to include all of the information that you wanted to provide?

NLT: No, I didn’t. I had certain points I wanted to make, but there was no set order to it.

CH: Is there a specific self-help message in your book that you want the readers to grasp?

NLT: Yes. Self-love is the greatest of all love. If you have a healthy relationship with yourself first, you are more likely to have a healthy relationship with someone else.

CH: Do you find that most people take your advice or do they continue to stay in a toxic relationship?

NLT: Everyone is different. Many people already know what they should do, but it’s not so easy to just do it.  Fannie Lou Hammer said it best when she said, “I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.” I know she was referring to Civil Rights, but it is so applicable to many areas of our life, including relationships.  When a person gets to a place where he/she is sick and tired of being in a toxic relationship, he/she will make the decision to love themselves enough to leave.

CH: What can we expect next from you?

NLT: I actually just released my fourth book on New Year’s Day, Live Now, Die Later. I’m really excited about this book and what’s to come as a result of this book. There’s a quote that reads, “Don’t live the same year 75 times and call it a life.” Sad to say, but that’s the story for so many people. They are just existing in life—not actually living.

CH: How to Find Nicole L. Turner:

CH: Can you tell my audience where this book is sold?

NLT: You can find my books on Amazon, Barnes and Nobles, and Books-A-Million.

CH: Any closing remarks?

NLT: Everyone deserves a love that brings them joy. It’s not going to always be sunshine and roses, but it should not be the constant cause of your stress. We are imperfect people. If you are seeking perfection in your relationship, you will always be disappointed. The greatest of all love is self-love.

CH: Thank you so much, Nicole L. Turner, for taking time out of your very busy writing schedule to join me and my blog followers.  It has been a real pleasure discussing your book with my audience.  And readers, if you’re like me and would enjoy this book.  I suggest you pick up a copy at your earliest convenience. 

Note: Photos/Clip art are compliments of the Internet, Nicole L. Turner and Cheryl Holloway.

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